Maybe I'm the Biggest Loser

Inspired by the near finale Biggest Looser (and by the Buffalo Exchange Earth Day Sale)I made a good faith effort to go through half my clothes and throw away the stuff I don't or wont wear any more. (By throw away I mean donate). It is absolutely devastating for me. I am a very sentimental gal, as you may or may not realize and I put so much identity in the way I dress.



I mean not in a stupid Fashion is Art Top Model sort of way. But I mean in a I project everything I am into my clothes- the outward projection of my inner turmoil. Half of my closet is clothes that are too dear to even wear anymore (I won't get into the gritty details, but going through the shirts and jackets and faded dresses I was happy and sad and wistful, nostalgic to the highest degree, the feeling of the different fabrics so reminiscent of different times of my life.)



BUT anyway two big trash bags later, I am about half way through. It is so hard, I have to make a deal with myself that I A) can keep the clothes for a little while in the bags, to see if I miss them and B) that I don't have to throw the clothes away, I will donate them so they can go live happy second lives with someone else.



Does this make me foolish? Perhaps. But it is hard too, and perhaps it is not so bad to put trust and love into tangible things

You should have a press pass

It seems more and more often when something out of the ordinary happens (a car crash, a stampede, someone gets naked. . . whatever) they are immediately surrounded by a mob of people with cameras (or cellphones) standing with their shoulders back, arm outstretched to the full length something like this:












All the time! When someone famous walks by, at concerts, when there is a fire, when there is a baby deer. We have created a society of paparazzi but what are we documenting everything for? And why have we removed ourselves by the filter of the camera? We are no longer engaging in tragedy/adventure we are just documenting it. . .like a whole city of Lelaina Pierces.

this whole thing was inspired by the new Matt and Kim video which is awesome which you can check out here but at the end the gal gets thrown to the ground pretty brutally as it is captured by a fat lady with a camera phone

The Swine Flu Day One: A day in links

Kingsford Goes to the Beach - video powered by Metacafe

Every Body Panic

And Don't Go to Mexico

This whole thing reminds me of John Bevridge talking about THE GLOBAL PANDEMIC and holding his hands up and wide apart like he was reading the words in lights

Despite having a skelton made of adamantium, Wolverine cancels all appearances in Mexico

The Real World Cancun must shut down filming (so: Wilma, 9/11 and now the Swine Pandemic, does MTVs the Real World have the worst luck ever or what? OR is someone at MTV headquarters connected in more evil ways that we thought?)

We've been through this before

THe first pictures of the infected are released to the public

AHHHH! No! You think I'm kidding but I am not. I have been flipping out all day. It is like the begining of a movie, a terrible one at that :(

Inedia

You learn something new every day! This is a real thing!

My question is. . . why would you want to live that way!?

As you probably know Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch is being broken apart and sold in pieces at auction! What you may not know is that most of it is available for purchase by the general public via Internet auction! (Thanks Max for the link!)

And while I would probably never actually buy anything from the MJ auction, it is certainly fun to look at his extensive collection of creepy children statutes and baroque furniture. BUT if for some reason your name is Richard Branson and you are feeling charitable, please please will you buy me this Ripley's Believe it or Not PinBall table? As you know it is one of my life dreams to own a PinBall table, preferably this one once played by Michael Jackson

Lobsterfest

If you have talked to me in the last month, you may have been subject to my intoxicated late night phone calls attempting to persuade you to pick me up to go to Red Lobster with me for Lobsterfest.

SO I finally got to go. Red Lobster created lots of strong emotions in me, unexpected feelings of weirdness. Lobsterfest was in fact really delicious. Although maybe my heart was going to stop from total butter saturation, I ate so much cheddar biscuits and shellfish I felt like the lobster had come back to life and was going to claw its way out of my stomach.

HOWEVER, because I never have been to a red lobster (except for that one time ten years ago. . .so that doesn't count) I experienced something similar (parallel is maybe a better word) to culture shock. Something about the half full lobster tank , the dark wood paneling, and the artificially weathered nautical signs freaked me out. Mostly it was the idea that at each of 651 US (and 29 in Canada) everything was exactly the same. The same half full lobster tank witht he rubber ban claws, dark wood paneling, and artificially weathered nautical signs, bored looking hostess, elderly couple, stressed out family of five, second dates, silverware wrapped in paper napkins slightly worn carpet etc etc, perhaps varying slightly by ethnicity and economic class, but not by much I feel. Of course this is the experience at most resturants I go to, but I had not realized it in such a profound way until then.

As punishment for driving all the way to Lynnwood for this adventure, my friend assured me most of the way home that the lobster I ate was certainly from the tank at the front that I cooed at so intently while we were waiting for our table. Can you imagine what it would be like to meet your meat every time you ate?! Would you be able to stand it? Or would it become passe.

OH MAN and did I tell you I also saw Fast and Furious that same night!? IT was amazing. Truly fantastic. Vin Diesel was embarssingly muscular in shirts embarssingly small. Oh man, so so good.

Hit me baby. . . no really hit me. . . I want you to hit me as hard as you can

As you may or may not know Britney Spears was recently in Seattle and my office of "music aficionados" was divided pretty evenly between people who were against the show on principle that it was Brittney Spears OR people who went to the show and justify it as a so-called guilty pleasure. I side with Chuck Klosterman in the opinion that there are no such things as guilty pleasure.

As far as it is "punk rock" to make fun of people who enjoy Britney Spears music, if you feel your tastes are elevated to the point of doing this, you must surely then be able to recoginize her importance as a cultural icon and how her complete lack of talent is exactly what elevates her worship to the perfect example of what is post modern

Last Sunday, the glittered hoards decended upon the Tacoma Dome, the great tit of the Northwest to see a woman that while claiming to be a musician has never claimed to have any ability to perform music perform a concert where no effort is made to even conceal the fact that no musical instruments are being played or songs being performed in anyway. It is like a scene out of Brave New World (like the super groovy Made for TV version, with Lenoard Nimoy) or maybe some better example of a dystopic future that I can't think of right now. But you know what I mean. Anyway I find if fascinating and depressing all at the same time, not least of which because I was not one of the lucky ones to get tickets.

In the tradition of extreme home makeover

AND the Olympics I did not make it 1 minute into this video before I started to well up. . .



From the always excellent Videogum!

This is hands down my favorite picture of Kurt Cobain. I feel like it could easily be a picture of me.

never to be seen again, always to be seen again

I just finished reading this article, 11 Extinct Animals That Have Been Photographed Alive which I found to be incredibly lovely and sad

There is a store across from Alderwood Mall called H-Mart- that I visited recently. I was having dinner with my friend Kendra, who told me she had found a place to buy whole pheasant as a treat for her kitten Nagi. What she described sounded so wonderful that we adventured there that same night.





H-Mart is an "Asian Food" Grocery store that evolved into an enclosed mini-mall (would this just be a small mall?) There is a bank, a food court, a jewelry store, an event hall, a bank, etc although it is unclear to me if all these smaller stores are under the same ownership. We were there around 9:30 right when everything was closing and the proprietor did not seem pleased with our giggling exploration

The grocery store was the largest segment of the H-Mart whole by far. I was struck by A) how beautiful and bright the product packaging was and B) the incredible product variation.

For example SALT:

I was struck by how dreary the United States must seem in comparison to, if this store is an accurate sampling, someone from Japan who is visiting

CANDY:

Of course to my sheltered sensibilities the most amazing part was the meat and fish section which was huge and was where one could buy whole birds, freeze dried whole minnows, exotic mollusks etc. and most impressively an entire giant octopus for (we think) $40

I desperately wanted to buy this, but I could not figure out how that transaction would pan out once I was home. Most likely I would disect it and turn its limbs to art and then a cat snack

Lets get real

I am facinated by the idea of reality tv, but I am AMAZED at the juggernaut (I wanted to go with Leviathan, but that doesn't seem quite right does it?) it has become. I was just overwhelmed (and inspired!) by this website that organizes open casting calls for "reality tv show." It seems that reality tv participant may in fact be a viable option for a carrer path in the future if not now. Enjoy the appropriately named: http://orwellproject.com/

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I read any article about a program called "Freedom" that disables the internet from your computer for a certian lenght of time of your choosing from five mins up to eight hours. How delicious. Her article is extremely great, self-reflective, funny and interesting my favorite line being: "I have found exactly how hungry -- and temporarily starved -- I've become for all the instant information I'm so used to having at my fingertips." Bingo

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2009/04/01/freedom_traister/

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I feel like I am about to go on the best blind date of my life. I have que'ed up a bunch of DVDs and documentaries by Earl Morris who I have never even heard of before Monday but now I am kind of in total love with and I am so nervous his 12 part interview series wont live up to my expectations! After all Roger Ebert has said, "After twenty years of reviewing films, I haven't found another filmmaker who intrigues me more...Errol Morris is like a magician, and as great a filmmaker as Hitchcock or Fellini"

http://errolmorris.com/